trichotillomania

sucks.

Til next year!

Welllllll.... I haven't much to say. I haven't journaled much since i've been home. I was making presents and things so I havent actually made anything for volume two. However, I got a quill pen set for christmas so I've been writing in my journal with those. I enjoy my pens. They are fun. I got purple ink too. And today I bought a big Marie Antoinette-like feather that I taped to my pen. That was fun too. I also got one of those little worm things that magically crawl on your hands and such. I haven't named it yet but he/she has proved to be pretty entertaining. I've wanted one since I went to the Southern Christmas show in like 4th grade, of course I wasn't about to tell everyone that. Speaking of wanting something since the fourth grade, I've been working on my juggling. Eventually, I might get somewhere with them. I'm better than the average Joe, but not smart enough to figure out tricks from the Stixguru video that I have. I've figured out like 3 of the 298742098375 tricks this guy can do. It's all good though, that's three tricks I didn't know before!

There's that whole New Years resolution thing that comes about this time every year. Mine is always the same. Stop bitting my fingernails. That lasts for a few days and then I say I'll stop for Lent and then I end up praying for forgiveness. My other resolution is to get into college and obtain insane amounts of money in the form of scholarships. Another resolution is to keep myself from becoming a prostitute if the latter resolution is not achieved. I would love to make some sort of devilstick resolution or a guitar resolution but I'm not going to stress myself out about that. Second to last resolution, stay single. That won't be hard considering I have no desires for a relationship. (Unless it's a Rush of Fools-esque boy. tee-hee). Last resolution, will not be shared here. It's not really a resolution anyway. But to end on a good note, I'm going to a New Years Party and that makes me happy. I go to the same one every year, but I love it (which is why I keep going) and it's never the same which keeps it from being boring. But even if it was always the same, I would still go. because I love it. STOP BABBLING!!!!!!! RAWR!

In other news, I'm going to Holy Angels on Friday! YAY!!! Happiness =]

The items on the right are the some of gifts I received for Christmas! One thing that is missing is the book Painted Prayers by Jody Uttal. It's probably one of the best books I have now!! It's totally wonderful, kinda like the person who gave me the book. =]

my room is a wreck =]

It's perfectly okay that my room is messed up because my roommate is absent. We haven't seen each other in a week and a half. I make BIG MESS IN ROOM. I raided a new pile o' magazines yesterday. I stayed in the floor roughly from 3pm to 1am. That's right. I should have been doing other things. Like say, the things I should be doing now but I didn't want to. I took the SAT yesterday morning. I believe when you take the SAT you can do whatever you well please the rest of the day. I wanted to cut up magazines. so I did. Kat also joined me. I've eaten an entire sleeve of saltine crackers in 24 hours. But that's pretty much all I've eaten so I doubt that it really matters. I'm about to drink some Fuze too. There are a bunch of fuze bottles rolling around in my floor. Some are empty, some are full... Why am I writing this?? I should be working on my Humanities paper. Well here is a page from my journal from last week. I thought it was pretty obvious in it's meaning, but after showing it to a few people, I learned otherwise... I finished scanning my first journal today. Thirty-three collages/paintings in two months. i win. =]

I did what?

I finished my journal last night. As in I filled up all the pages. I've never finished a journal before. When I was little people would always give me diaries and either wrote for 3 days in it or my mom used them for phone messages and grocery lists. Part of me wishes I would have written in them, but better late than never right? I wonder how long I will carry around volume 1 before I just keep volume 2 with me. I went out today and bought volume 2. It looks so weird. I wasn't even sure it was the same sketchbook that volume 1 was. It looks so naked. I'm going to go work on the cover of it after I finish this.

I'm going to Holy Angels tomorrow and the convent. I'm very excited. =]

Creatively and spiritually productive. not so much for all that other stuff.

This weekend, I completed 6 pages of my journal. They are all very lovely. SEE? <----

I made an especially awesome one of Obama, but it won't be on here until after Thanksgiving. I want to give the cool people copies before I release it to the world. Not like people read this, but it might get on google it or something. Plus I want to mail it to Obama too. I think he will like it.

I'm very proud of my suitie MAnne because she did a journal page this weekend too!

I wonder how much it would bug my roomie if I just turned our room into a journal room on the weekends. I would clean it up...

Obama =]

Journal party tonight with Kat and Jessieh!!! Hosted in my room this time! I did two pages and now I'm working on a third. I'm contemplating posting one of my works from tonight. I used 20 pages in my journal for the month of October! I might need a new journal before the new year! That's really exciting!!!

It's quite possible I could make my new journal cover with my favorite person in the world. We are looking into having a journal party of our own. It will be wonderful.

Application Status: Seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. I hope there's a big ice cream cone waiting for me.

I really want a scanner for Christmas or my birthday. A nice one. Like the one in the library at school.

My butt [[which reminds me of today in English when Patrick mouthed a nice little phrase to me to which i responded, very loudly, "Oh just because I won't massage your butt??" a lovely moment really.]] is falling asleep and I'm tired of sitting with my back halfway on the fridge. Time for a break and then back to JOURNALING!!! =]=]=]

Drinking fuze from a skull goblet...

Oh my. what to do? No rehearsal. Journal. Its been a few days since my last creative pages and I feel the need to cut and paste and paint and be creative again.

I'm almost through with a wonderful book. I've found my tribe. It's wonderful.

One of my recent pages is a favorite now. I really like it. I'll share it here and hope it doesn't end up on google or something weird. Some kid passing it off as theirs. How lame...



In other, but completely related, news, I want to go to Appalachian State University. The end. I don't care if Clemson has offered me $10,000. My mental state is more important to me than my post graduate financial state. App State=Happy Clemson=Sad.

Oh boy, newsboys on my Zune. =]

CH-CH-CHANGES

My old posts

I did some cleaning around the ol' blog. Took out some stuff and read my old posts. I'm kinda funny when I'm mad or frustrated. I read something I didn't want to read today, not on my blog, somewhere else. It makes me wonder....But I'm not going to get into it. I know where I stand, and I'm standing strong. I AM NOT ASHAMED TO SPEAK THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST!! Here's a lovely song [another one if you caught that last line] by my favorite boyz. The lyrics might be slightly off because I just got them off of a webpage. but you get the picture.

You don't understand
this is not what you think it is
You don't get it, man
you want to boil it down to show biz
Your in depth research shows:
drop the God, emphasize the beat
I've heard that positive pop you dig--
I'd rather be buried in wet concrete
Take back your free advice
I don't accept
I will not play those games
God is not a secret to be kept
God is not a secret to be kept

You don't understand
I'm not talking multiple choice
You don't get it, man
if the cross offends you, find another voice
I am not running for office here
I won't keep it purposefully vague
I've heard New Age Life-force trip
I'd rather be dipped in bubonic plague

Take back your free advice
I don't accept
I will not play those games
God is not a secret to be kept
God is not a secret to be kept

Faith ain't easy to understand
When a bird in the bush beats two in the hand
The truth ain't nothin' you taste and hide
You gotta get up, put up, get off your backside
x2

If we keep silent
If we mass defect
These very rocks will scream
God is not a secret to be kept
God is not a secret to be kept

And would I wash my hands again?
Would I deny my savior when
he hung inside the public square?
Did not my silence put him there?
----------------------------------


I'm homesick. It's not for my house or for school. It's Holy Angels! SURPRISE! I can't wait to go back. Whenever that will be. Most definitely next extended weekend. But maybe even in a few weeks when we go to the convent. =]

The first two weeks.

I believe it is time for me to sit and write a blog. As a part of my productive procrastination program [ppp], I consider posting this appropriate. [notice my alliteration].

I have survived the first two weeks of my senior year at SCGSAH. I think I can survive the rest of the year. A bunch happened over these past two weeks, which is probably why part of me thinks I've been in school for 6 weeks instead of just two. Things that happened, in what ever order they come to me in because I don't think very well chronologically. Also, somewhat vague:

-I missed Holy Angels like I can't even begin to describe. I especially missed Amy and Gaye. I have Amy's artwork and pictures from this summer at Holy Angels on my wall next to my desk. But even if those pictures weren't there, I would still think about it constantly. I've never missed something this much before. And I'm still missing it as I type this. I didn't even miss school this much when I came home this summer. Thank goodness for cell phones, email and Facebook because Gaye is my favorite person ever and I get really sad when I can't talk to her. All this missing of Holy Angels proves how much I need to be there... I better stop on this subject, I'll start crying. [[Just like I did when I shared my summer in class]]
-I was cast as Sister James in "Doubt" by John Patrick Shanley. My dream role (besides the ever common elphaba and then of course there is sylvia. but i play sylvia everyday) . I love "Doubt" and I loved seeing it a year or so ago in Charlotte with Cherry Jones. And my lovely Sisters of Mercy are so very very happy that I will be a nun, even if it's temporary. I wanted the role so badly!!! I'm taking Alex, Daisy and possibly Kyndra to the convent to meet with the sisters. [and we can visit holy angels!!!]
-Our school experienced a tragedy that I never imagined would happen. I'm praying for his family and friends. I'm going to leave it at that because I'm really not wanting to get into it.
-Something was patched up. I hope.
-My brother called me, just me, just to talk.
-I told Mr. Day I wanted to go to college for Creative Arts Therapy and I didn't plan on going to Chicago. He told me to keep my options open. I still don't want to go to Chicago. It might be a lot of fun, but I can have fun at school and save $1000. [maybe i can take a college day to queens but really spend most of the day at holy angels!!]
-I met some potentially awesome kids at school who started a youth group. I say potentially because I don't know them yet. =]=]=]
-I got up one morning and went to Sunshine club to practice my guitar. My fingers almost went on strike after that. I better tell Amy when I see her again.
-I played football for the first time. It was fun but don't think I'm actually going to watch it on TV or something. I still have no idea why I ran after Michael and attacked him, but apparently it was the right thing to do.
-I bought tickets to the What Life Would Be Like: Rush of Fools/Big Daddy Weave tour. Amy is coming with me. It's going to to be flipping awesome.
- I found my twin sister from a parallel universe. Brittany is pretty cool. She taught me how to make bassoon reeds and I introduced her to newsboys, ROF and idina menzel. We both have a freckle on the palm of our right hand. We love Autism: The Musical and are hopefully going to the Autism walk together covered in sharpie puzzle pieces. She wants to do special education/music therapy. And I didn't have to explain snoezelen to her. It's pretty awesome. I want her to come Holy Angels with me. She knew about Holy Angels too!
-I went to O-cha. It was amazing of course.
-Neha and I took a legal trip to Publix and Staples and we played Bombay dreams as we walked. It was really fun. I got paper clips shaped like guitars and some chocolate soy milk. Neha got sushi and easy mac. She also experienced how fast Jimmy John's can make a sandwich.
-The cafeteria is not so good this year. I've been satisfied with about 3 meals so far. That's only one day of food if you think about it. All the more reason to have Publix in our walking bounds now. I see much microwave noodle in future. Comment card: STOP PUTTING BELL PEPPERS IN EVERYTHING! AHHHHHHHHHHHH. Barbra preached to me about taking chocolate milk out of the cafeteria. I really want to tell her that the handbook also states the food in the cafeteria is suposed to be INVITING. I feel more invited to go sit under the stairs and eat toothpaste some nights. My toothpaste did have more color than the hot line one night. Everything was white. I use the ever colorful aquafresh. And no, bell peppers do NOT count as color.
-CATS CATS CATS. One of my favorite people is leading CATS this year. Mrs. Tromsness is totally amazing and totally heading CATS. I'm probably going to be the CATS PR. WOOO! YAY SPIRIT! And I'm trying to get a trip to Holy Angels going.
-Julie Stanchek left for a new job and that makes me really sad. Ron will still be there but its not going to be the same without Julie. I did however, win her guessing contest and came out with roughly 350 hershey kisses!
-AP Lit is going to be awesome. I'm really hoping we can cure my inability to write an essay. I know Dr. Thomas will help me. She has faith in me. YAY FAITH. I gotta warn her she is starting to compete for the favorite teacher spot. Of course, no one can ever top Mrs. Walters but Dr. Thomas is getting up there.
-I might do well in French. I think I actually studied and did well on the first friday quiz.
-B Days rock- I get out of class at 1pm.
-There was a tornado warning on tuesday during Humanitites. Cory and I held onto each other in the VA basement away from the rest of the class because we are both really afraid of tornados. I loved having someone to panic with me for once. Usually it's just me going nuts and everyone laughing at me in the fetal position under my desk, which is what I did before we were told to go to the basement. There werent any tornados in Greenville thank goodness. Holy Angels got a little tramatized by the storm. that made me sad, but did give harry something to do at work!
- I forgot to pack my bookbags and so my mom had to mail them to me. And Loyd sent me a letter in an Ebenezer Grill envelope.
-I made a new email address. It's pure genious but I'm not sharing it here. It does have to do with Tina Fey.
-Neha is really super obsessed with Obama. It's a little scary but totally hilarious! I got some of it on video as proof.
-The RLC's are way to strict this year when it comes to room cerfew. I enjoy the relax room inspection this year but no leaving my room after 10:30pm? NOT COOL!
- I came up with a really cool idea for a tatoo. If I ever pull it off, it will be amazing!
-The finance guy who calls me Tina Fey is letting me borrow his first season of 30rock . i really need to learn his name. He's one of those people I just can never remember his name!!! and it makes me feel really bad!
- I found a bunch of people who like/love newsboys, including Dr. Thomas, Dan the security guy and a several students.
-I actually wrote a page or two in my journal and taped some stuff in it. go me!

i cant think of anything more. its only taken me about an hour and half to write all this. yay for self because i actually wrote it. woooo. time to go to bed because I have to go to church in the morning. and the clock on blogger is an hour behind. its really almost midnight. wow, a lot happened in two weeks! =]=]=]

ps. today i picked up a copy of catholicism for dummies, a book of praise songs, a copy of doubt for the sisters and the people magazine with ellen degeneres' wedding pictures [[which is probably the sweetest thing ever]]. i also got my hair cut at great clips. they were giving away free camp rock/hannah montana posters with each kid's haircut. I'm glad I'm not considered a kid. I would have had myself a mini bonfire tonight. which would have been freakishly rained out by the thunderstorm we had with the sun still out.